Thank you, Amy, for reminding me of this comparison. And thank you, Monica, for bringing it to my attention in the first place. I thought I would share the following piece with everyone because it so accurately describes the journey that I, and others with autistic children, have actually been blessed to have gone through. While it is a very difficult situation to endure and deal with on a daily basis, I can only smile when I read the following:
"Welcome to Holland"
By Emily Perl Kingsley, 1987. All rights reserved.
I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......
When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo, David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.
After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."
"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."
But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.
The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.
So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.
It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.
But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."
And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away...because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss. But...if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.
I know this may sound crazy, but you get to the point where you realize that if all of the sudden you wake up in Italy, you would actually MISS those "very special, very lovely things...about Holland."
I love you, Jacob!!!!
5 comments:
I had not heard that term before, but what a beautiful poem. Love it.
Just wanted you to know that I posted about your blog and linked to it from mine. :-)
I'm so glad you have a blog!
Sarah
Thank you... we have been blessed with 6 grandchildren who live in Italy, and love every exciting minute of what they teach us. We have one grandchild who lives in Holland. In the last 112 days or so, we are seeing so much excitement and learning and interacting and sharing in him, that we are learning a lot about Holland ... and loving it. It is not an easy life, but it is a reward all its own, as you know! Will look forward to reading more!
Congratulations on your blog!!!
Jonah/Abigail's Memaw!
What a neat story! That about made me cry! It's so true though isn't it? You could apply that way of thinking about many areas in your life.
I love Jacob for the person that he is. He wouldn't be "Jacob" if he was any different.
No matter how many times I hear this analogy, it always makes me cry.
There are days when it's hard to have challenge but others when you reach the top of one of the many mountains in your life & you check out the view & are glad you persevered to the top.
You know our little challenge which I am in no way comparing to your challenges, but I know the times I've prayed & cried & wondered just what God was thinking...
but the truth is, that He knew you'd be Jacob's momma after he realized that you were strong enough & just perfect -- to love him & raise him exactly the way he should be.
That's what I remember sometimes... that God must've thought I could handle it.
Post a Comment